Why First Drafts Suck and Why they should.

I recently read my first draft, of Close Corp for the first time in a long time. I was struck by how bad it is, which made me wonder if maybe the story was not worth the effort of a re-write.  Then I remembered an article I read while in Law School;  about why lawyers should never be satisfied with the first draft. The article, went on the explain, that drafts were just that drafts, a jumping off point to what you really intended.

Looking at Close Corp,  I began to think about what I really want the story to say, on the macro and micro level.  I looked at my plots and sub plots.  Finally coming to the conclusion that I did not like the story is because it now yet what I envision.  

Though it is far from my vision,  what I do have is a draft,  material to work with which will allow me to fill in holes, expand the story and contract the story.  Though this draft is rough,  looking at it as a whole I realize that it is just the starting point.  And I sigh, a sigh of relief.

This process made me wonder,  do all authors look at their drafts, second guess the story, the characters,  the worlds they have created.  Are we all displeased with our creations? Seeing them as errant children that have not lived up to your expectations. Or is this a singular thought and feeling.

To discover, my answer I did what comes naturally to me; I researched the questions.  What I found is that consistently authors say that rough drafts suck, are just the beginning, the clay to build the story,  the start of the creation not the end.  As I read article after blog I realize that I am not in singular in this feeling.  But I wonder why?  Why can't the story in my mind emerge fully formed onto the page just as I imagine?

For me the answer to that is that what I want and expect of the story changes as I write.  I don't start off with the crystal clear image fully formed.  I start of with something like a half remembered dream that I am trying to re-create.  And as the pieces come together the image is fine tuned,  but at the same time perfection of creation is an every moving point, Just out of grasp.

But that is why you need drafts,  to fine tune, and focus your image to a point were you might be willing to let that errant child run free, for good or ill.

So here is to all the stories that were not what the author thought, wanted, imagined, but are loved by the rest of us, even as the author looks down and shakes her head knowingly.

“Awful first drafts are fine—Agree with this.
If you don’t finish something, you’ll never get in the game. Just quell the voice in your head that says “Are you kidding? No one is going to want to read this drivel” and keep on going. You’re going to revise and revise and then revise again anyway.” 
― Jamie Frevelett